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Grub

Today three friends and I went to Grub (www.grub-la.com) for brunch. We had seen it on a Cooking Channel show and also read excellent reviews on Yelp and couldn’t wait to try it. We called the night before to make reservations but the guy who answered the phone told us they don’t take reservations for parties under six. 

He also said it wouldn’t be that busy at 11am so we wouldn’t need a reservation anyway. Either he was a lying bastard or never bothers to get off the phone and look outside because there was a long line when we arrived. As we patiently waited for our table, we were considering heading over to nearby Mud Hen Tavern for brunch instead. By the end of our meal, we wished we had done exactly that.

My friends got Our Friggin’ Amazin’ French Toast. It’s croissants coated with cinnamon vanilla batter served with maple syrup, pecans and their homemade raspberry butter. If you’re going to be bold and call your French toast friggin’ amazin’, it better be friggin’ amazin’. Especially if you’re going to be cocky and drop the Gs. 

It turns out Grub can’t put their money where your mouth is. My friends thought it was just your run of the mill French toast. One friend was so looking forward to the raspberry butter, he ordered his French toast with an extra dollop. He was disappointed with it as well and said it was salty and barely had any raspberry taste.

Friggin' Amazin' French Toast. More like Friggin' Disappointin' French Toast.

Here's a tip: If you want frigging amazing French toast, get the cinnamon roll French toast at Tallyrand in Burbank. It’s not only spectacular but so secure in it’s ooey goodness, it doesn’t need to drop the Gs.

I had Mamacita’s Breakfast Burrito. It’s scrambled eggs with chorizo, melted cheddar, garlic and herb roasted potatoes topped with salsa and sour cream in a flour tortilla. I enjoyed the burrito but, again, there was nothing remarkable about it. It wasn’t any better than the breakfast burritos I make at home. 

The chorizo was tasty but I was disappointed with the potatoes. You see, I am a potato addict. I love me some spuds. The potatoes were a little too big to put inside a burrito and definitely would’ve benefited if they were chopped up. They were also a little dry, undercooked and didn’t have much taste.

Mamacita's Breakfast Burrito.

Finally, we have the bacon. Perhaps you may have heard of it. It is supposedly so good it’s known as “crack" bacon. As a matter of fact, a customer even wrote a jingle about it. We made sure to get a side of it but didn’t see what the big deal was. 

It was chewy (Full disclosure: I am not a fan of chewy bacon) with a slight taste of cumin I didn’t think went well with the bacon. Perhaps it’s called “crack" bacon because you must be on crack if you think there’s anything special about it.

We all agreed the place is pricy. It was $5.95 for a side of the bacon. When I was looking at the menu, I noticed their egg sandwich is $13.99. I’m sorry but that is friggin’ amazin’ crazy. For $13.99, that chicken better be laying gold eggs. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for paying more for exceptional quality but there was nothing exceptional about our dishes. 

Grub's famous "Crack" Bacon. If you think it's awesome, then
you must be on crack.

The only thing we all liked was the complimentary bowl of assorted cereal they give you when you’re seated. But for what we paid for brunch, we could’ve bought Snap, Crackle and Pop and made them our bitches.

To add insult to injury, we discovered when we got our bill that our friend had been charged sixty cents for his extra raspberry butter. Seriously? An extra tiny little dollop of butter and you can’t give it to him for free?

As we made our way out, we all agreed that next time we want to get our grub on, we’re definitely going to be getting it on somewhere else.